Ambient Read online

  "What now?" Avalon asked; I helped her climb over. I followed, picking my way across the damp rubble. On the other side we glimpsed flickering light further down, past a bend, and heard music.

  "That's it," I said. "Come on."

  A few feet along I noticed a board hanging from the tunnel's roof, and turned my flash upon it. There was an inscription painted on it:

  "What's it mean?" Avalon asked.

  "It's just a threat." I switched off my flash. The music's vol upped as we neared; through baffling echoes I distinguished the instruments-flutes and recorders, kotos and drums. Only secular Ambient music employed the human voice, for which I was grateful.

  "Be very quiet," I whispered. "It's still going on. We want to wait until they're through. Then we'll find Enid."

  "You sure she'll be there?"

  "Yeah." As we drew closer, the light illuminated the tunnel so far down as we were-some sort of torchlight, it appeared. Before we rounded the bend, a resounding cry arose from the unseen crowd; the music stopped. Someone began speaking in a deep voice. Creeping closer, attempting to see without being seen, I viewed the platform; Avalon, keeping behind me, looked out, gasped, and fell back.

  "Shameless," she said, breathless. "Fucking hell-"

  "What's the matter?"

  "What's the matter?" she repeated. "Look!"

  I did, carefully vizzing the speaker. "I thought he sounded familiar," I said. "That's Derek. He lived down the street from me the first year we moved down. He comes to the club every once in a while."

  "You know it?"

  "I know him, yes."

  Holding tight to Avalon's hand, kneeling, I scooted up to the very edge of the platform, and peered above. All assembled faced the opposite direction, toward Derek, away from us; the light was not so good that we could be easily seen in any event. The station consisted of a long platform with tracks edging each side; along the platform edge, down its length, long poles set at intervals held torches aloft. The crowd was large; I spotted few familiar faces at once. Derek, at the speaker's platform, held forth.

  "-in the third book of the Visions of Joanna, we play in cue, likeminded, as Macaffrey spears tongue to lying soulsmerchants, pickspittles limp with clotting bile, cullions and jabbemowls and skinpeeled fools. Dust-kittens of thought blow about their balking heads. Logic grays, withers, and sprouts green mold as their mouths let drop idle lists-"

  Derek was a dogboy, covered with long hair-once blond, now dark brown-from top of head to tip of toe; he wore a black suit and black shirt. Like all original Ambients, he was several years younger than I. We never spoke much, as children; even when so young Ambients preferred their own company, and I'm sure that they awed my friends so much as they awed me-it was one of those things no one ever really talked about. The platform on which he stood was quite low, not more than a foot high; Ambients prefer reasonably equal footing for all within their group. As Enid explained to me, they each spoke in turn every month, so that one day all would have had a chance to speak.

  -her heart beats Macaffrey's. Her eyes viz plain, see what goes, and catch what gives. In his induration within and through their perfect union he holds nada nadie to that which God demands, but to that which Godness lawed, he lets fright settle and earfastens yet, espying the time-"

  Ambients used parts of the Bible and a book called the Visions of Joanna in their services; I'd read Enid's copies of the latter, both in its original form and in Ambient translation. Ambients preferred those characters in the Bible whom they saw as never having been given their due-Cain, Ham, Esau, Judas, and now Jesus-and developed, through the messages of Macaffrey as told by Joanna, a most remarkable viewpoint of the Creator: that It had split into two intelligences during the act of Creation, one male, and evil; one female, and good-both driven quite insane by having created what They had. What one did, the other undid, and vice versa. As I've said, I'm not one for dogma of any sort, but that concept did cover much that was questionable.

  "These are the days that change. Time runs birdwild, and none snare the shadows ascamp before them. No more. Paint shades pale, set passion aflaming, alight all eyes with will-o'-the-wisp and ringgold. Dance light over their walls, on their streets; deny no truth, suffer no fools. They cling to dead past like flies to paper. Each year skips no ho and they further yark and fetter themselves tight with their own dead bowels, encanted by the dread of time lostbegone. We seize time's wings, to our own flight give rise. What's done is done; what was, was. What is, is, will be, can be, might be, must be. Memory steals. Promise gives."

  Together, the unity was called Godness-for Joanna felt that the better of the two should be most recognized. Macaffrey, the story went, came as Messiah just before the Ebb and proceeded to suffer the traditional fate of messiahs. Joanna spread the word he brought. Among Ambients it remained a common, if generally unspoken, belief that she yet lived, hiding away somewhere in the wilds of Long Island. Much Ambient exigesis had been written concerning her book; the final inferred belief was that someday, somehow, an Ambient would effect the changes that made whole the two and therefore bring forth a new Godness, supreme in logic and in fairness.

  "Godness who lends morningshade's light, Godness who struck the moon with fire; Godness who rolls the thunder, who rages the sea, who splits the earth and laughs as children weep; Godness who lurks in sky's white cotton, who blinds eye and deafens ear, take our heed. Where there are two, make one. Seal covenant soon. Spit back our tears. Take fire and burn. He who asks for crime, She who asks for blessing. He who curses, She who kisses. He who wishes vengeance, She who wants for love. Feel glory's voice, and give cause to beat our hearts hereafter-"

  Till time's lovely end. Behind Derek was the old stairway, long blocked off with concrete slabs. Painted on that wall was a representation, artfully executed, of Godness, as Ambients conceived. The portrait showed a massive, naked figure, possessing the marks of both sexes, poised on the edge of a crevasse. The darkness below its webbed feet spread upward, surrounding the figure. From the mouth down there was one; from the mouth upward there were two heads, and two faces, squashed together as if in a vise. Godness held Its hands above Its head, gripping the world in Its paws, preparing to dash it into the abyss below.

  The congregation lifted voice in concluding prayer.

  "To Godness the Ten In One," Derek intoned.

  "Godness Father," they cried.

  "Godness Son."

  "Godness Mother."

  "Godness Daughter."

  "Godness Brother."

  "Godness Sister."

  "Godness Friend."

  "Godness Lover."

  "Godness Creator."

  "Godness Destroyer."

  "Eyes alight!" someone shouted.

  "We're spotted," I said.

  "Should we run?"

  "Don't even move."

  As they turned to face us, their forms yellow silhouettes in the pale light, I saw not only those with whom I'd always felt comfortable through familiarity, but also ones the likes of whom I'd never believed existed, no matter Enid's occasional remarks; it seemed unlikely that they could have survived birth, much less aged, and thrived. Avalon slumped as I held her; for a moment I think that she passed out, though she later denied it. Ambients started hopping down onto the tracks; they slithered forward, they rolled along. I saw Ruben and Lester; saw too the bartender who'd served me two nights past. I saw as well a girl with two bodies joined at a single head; a man with three heads, none absolutely complete, as if the sculptor had forgotten where to put what; a woman, a true mermaid, her lower limbs fused, and ending in a wide, toed fin; a woman with three legs, balancing as if on a tripod; a set of Siamese triplets; a gent whose arms ended in two hands, on both wrists. There were voluntary Ambients, lacking eyes, noses, jaws, arms, legs, hands, or feet; there were transies; there were two small ones; whom I've not seen since, and wish I'd never seen. They resembled nothing so much as ambulatory, sentient bunches of grapes. Nearly everyone carried
cuchillos, or machetes, or chainsaws of the type Enid had given me. Lester, maskless, his features tightset on me, perched at the edge of the platform.

  "O'Malley," he said, snarling. "Adventure enow abounds topside. Dip your paws in hives of wasps if stings so allure."

  "I'm sorry," I said, trying to calm them; Avalon fastened her arms so tight around me that I suspected-were they to pouncethat they should have to pry her away with crowbars. "We didn't wish to interrupt-"

  "Come bezzling our world and apprise your chance onceover," said a fellow walking toward us, his single eye, set in his forehead, glaring.

  "Ours isn't yours. Yours isn't ours."

  "Viz the whipperginny leeched to his beef," a woman said. His owner's pie, plump with death's fruit."

  "Is Enid here?"

  "Number your reasons," said one, his lips' corners nearly touching his ears as he grinned. "In steady haste."

  "Seamus," I heard her shout; it had taken her a moment to realize who had interrupted, and then additional seconds to push through the crowd. She wore her leatherette jumpsuit with the wide padded shoulders. "What goes?"

  "We didn't have any choice," I said.

  She leapt down onto the tracks, coming briskly toward us. I felt Avalon's grip tighten; felt it hard to breathe. "Your presence denudes dreams carefully clothed. You know-"

  "Enid," I said. "I'm sorry. Something happened. We were being chased. We couldn't go back to the apartment. We didn't have any other way of reaching you."

  She sighed, smiling; looked us over, paying particular attention to the haphazard turban wound round my head. "Did you ride behind the train that took you down?"

  "We kept running into people-"

  "Bear us wist, and hold, Enid," someone said. "Your copesmates eye wary."

  "From under lumps of gold serpent's heads lure with poison tongue aflick," said the woman wearing a long blue nightshirt; she looked almost normal, until beneath the brighter light I saw that each eye held two pupils. "He may stand yet to let trail bastard scutches trip fast upon our track."

  "Bepissing us," said another, "striking deep with artful craft."

  A young girl pushed forward, holding a tissue to her large blue eyes-eyes constantly tearing, eyes set at the end of short stalks rising from her face.

  "Lozel's paws roam free from oppro knocks," she said. "And set a bridge aspan to owner's shores. We know those ways, no matter how thick the blood of sisters runs."

  "Leah-" Enid began to say, but was interrupted.

  "Leaving prints on every mind," she went on, "setting aghast the undeserving. Smudging all with woodworm ways. Sighting their paths ariding death's baby carriage. A secret stolen is a secret lost, Enid. A labyrinth broached sets loose the minotaur. Danger's end must need quicken-"

  "Bestill your mouth!" Enid shouted, moving next to me, raising her arms as if setting to fight. "My brother knows and respects our ways. He comes not incog, wrapped tight in liar's shrouds. Seamus seeks his sister's shoulder, thereon to set his head."

  "Yet bonaroly there moves in mysterious ways, her wonders to deform," said Ruben, staring at Avalon. "So vulture-eyed and leering prim. Last eve she tarried en casa, Enid. In su casa. When morningshade sent Serena off, beasts set aprowl through our hough. "

  "One we axed onehand," Lester laughed.

  "Her charms seduce Seamus's flesh," Ruben continued. "Drives him hard to twist and turn. What if her fire blinds his eye and bums his sense away?"

  "Toss by and see," Enid snapped. "There is naught to fear-"

  "Mayhap your sense is singed by brotherlove," Derek said, brushing hair away from his mouth. "His fornicatress might with ease slink murder past as you viz on, brow dim with thought of one who was, but is no more."

  "Bloody bloody balls," said Enid, her voice low.

  "Those who folly deceive," screamed another, in the back, "deceive all else so well-"

  "Folly is as folly does," yelled Margot, swinging her swordstick, sidescuttling forth like a crab. She jumped down onto the tracks with a thud and waddled toward us; I groaned as she once more stamped upon my foot, digging in those nails. "Reason runs when fear trips by. Lay still minds ablather and hear me."

  They settled; Margot was considered by all to be one of the most logical-and meanest-of their number. Her words usually stuck where she threw them.

  "Mewlypuke stands tall here, tall and stupid," she said, gesturing to me. "His lollipop, the same. What sins they tote are writ plain on their eyebrows. Words of smoke these hoblobs grunt. Clench easy if you stand to hold, but for whose point? Prick pimples into ulcers for so much good as that. "

  "They're not of us, Margot-"

  "Caprichos up and down," she said, poking Avalon in the stomach with her stick. "Here. Can't reap what can't be sown. And eye those shiny whites filling her puss. Pop them out and old gummy granny grins. As for him-" Taking her stick, lifting it, she brought it down cleanly, knocking off my remaining ear. "Ambients both," she said, flashing her sharp teeth. "Angels unaware, mayhap. Fools sans money, morelike. So you would carve your own? Tear the flesh that binds you? Spill the blood that sets you springing? Go, then. Do your will. But bear my words on bitter days later."

  Margot's tact carried; the crowd relaxed. Undercurrents of words suggested that they all gave pause to thought.

  "Go your ways," she said. "Spend your fear in worthy guise. Peak your wonder and off. Enid and I shall layaway the cullions to the safe house."

  The group dispersed, eyeing us carefully as they disappeared into the tunnel's void.

  "Margot, thanks-" I began saying; she laid her stick hard across my knees. I nearly fell down.

  "Brainsitter," she said, crossing over to Enid. "For your loving sis I overed and conned and extraughted your way clear."

  "Whatever," I said, rubbing my knees. "I'm glad it worked."

  "Who reddied your sconce?" she asked, peering upward. "Fools attempting to pound sense therein?"

  "They weren't that charitable," I said. "Where are you going to take us?"

  "Home would be best," said Enid. "But if what you list holds, they'll keep lights on for you all over. There'll be no rubs at the safe house. There you'll stay womb-safe."

  "How'll we get there?" asked Avalon.

  "Trip with us in like paths, headbent evernear," said Margot. "You'll settle soon enow."

  Avalon looked puzzled, as if she didn't understand.

  "Will there be anything to eat there?"

  "Corpsechewers may gnaw their own picked bones-"

  "Don't pish them so, Merricat," said Enid, reknotting my turban. "There'll be food of basic type."

  "Good. "

  "Ready and ablewill, then. Breeze with us now," said Enid.

  "Will they find us?" asked Avalon. "Where we're going?"

  "Once we skim they'll find us not at all," said Margot. "Time weighs heavy and this station stinks with fear like fusty rooms. The low road awaits. We'll slip away. Up and over, around and down. "

  Enid pulled an extra flash from her jacket and pitched it to Avalon. Her own chainsaw swung freely below her arm, beneath her wrap. She picked up Margot, perching her behind her head, on her shoulders; Margot's stubby legs vised Enid's neck. She grasped Enid's spikes as if to steer.

  "Those torches'll be all right?" I asked.

  "Gas," said Enid, "eternal flames."

  "I didn't know Con Ed still worked down here."

  "Nor do they."

  Just into the tunnel, beyond the light, I detected an unexpected odor. Waving my flash along the walls, I saw iron cages hanging from the overhead girders. In the cages were corpses of advanced grades.

  "Overzealous explorers," explained Enid, "who go because it's there."

  "And they're there," said Margot, "because we're here."

  With every step it became clear to me that during our adventures I'd pulled all of my muscles while breaking my bones.

  "At our casa you whiled last eve?" Enid asked. "In our room?"

  "Yes," I said
.

  "Bedded there to bide away with sweetums?" she said. "Have we then lost what Godness lent us to keep?"

  "Sanity?" I asked.

  "I spec he was all agog to let swive her unshelled motherspearl," said Margot. "Much maidenhead he'll answer for at trumpet-time. "

  "While leaving by traditional modes. In hand awaits ever relief's sweet kiss," said Enid.'

  "His paws linger to grope grander fare, in glory high."

  "Miss me?" I asked Margot.

  "In your absence," she sighed, "so heartfond was I that all clouds above turned gray-gold light."

  "You understand them?" Avalon asked me.

  "Sure," I said.

  "Why do you talk like that?" she asked them.

  "Our gab leaves weak minds apuzzle," said Margot. "With it we select who gives ear."

  Avalon stared at Enid; vizzed Margot bobbing along. "Aren't those nails painful?" she asked.

  "For those who fall upon," said Enid.

  "A look as death redoubled finifies you," said Margot, turning to eye Avalon. "Wherein did mewly press you on?"

  "Pardon?"

  "Flying you after airy promise and painted allure?"

  "What?"

  Margot laughed. "New bonnets for old boneache."

  "You'll pick it up after a time," I told Avalon.

  Enid steered her flash toward a dark passage leading off to the right. "Waysalong here. Through the dark dark deep."

  "This looks pleasant," I said; our coils of light streamed into the passage's depths. It appeared no more than a crude tunnel chiseled through. The chipped walls were daubed with niter, and cobwebs; splashes of fungus enlivened the monochrome of the rock. "Where does it go?"

  "Follow," she said. "We adapted this to all purposes."

  "Come this way often?" Avalon asked me.